we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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