I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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