The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
