If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize