Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
