Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize