Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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