You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I love black thongs
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I would fuck him just for his dog
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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