david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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