Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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