I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
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