After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I will pee on everything he values.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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