WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
