i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
