I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Randomize