I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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