the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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