I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
