i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
