ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Buhtt sex?
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
