D3 body, D1 cock
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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