What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
