i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I think my moral compass just broke
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
