they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
i think im in europe. pls send help
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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