I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
