ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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