I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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