This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
