Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Drunk is not a location!
Randomize
