I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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