We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize