I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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