I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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