pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
