I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Do you have feelings for this penis?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
