My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize