Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
