Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
