You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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