I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
