census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Come share oat with me in your robe
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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