I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
