Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
