In the future we'll all be gay
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
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