Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Randomize
