Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize