and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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