so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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