I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
True but thats because hes a fetus.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
