no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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