So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Michael Bay diarrhea
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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